We find that some adoptive parents are “afraid” of birthmothers. They worry that if she knows their name and where they live, she will try to take the baby back at some point in time. This is a common misconception.

Birthmothers are varied. They typically range in age from 12 to 44 and their reasons for choosing adoption are as diverse as they are.

Birthmothers make an adoption plan because they believe it is the very best plan for their child. Birthmothers love their babies – they’re not “giving them away”! She chose life for her child and is making a painful and selfless decision. Birthmothers are bravely willing to give birth and place their child with an adoptive family, trusting that they will love and protect this child as much as she would. Birthmothers make this choice out of love and complete concern for the welfare of their child. It is an emotional journey for her, just as it is for our adoptive families.

The advantages to all the parties in a semi-open or open adoption:

The child never has to wonder why he or she was placed for adoption.

• They will not have to fantasize that their birthparent is a movie star or
  famous ball player.
• They will understand that this difficult choice was made by a birthmother who loved them very much.
• As the child grows and matures and questions develop, those questions can be answered honestly.
• A birthmother has peace of mind with her decision because she is able to know her child is well, happy and loved. She has “proof” in the way of photos or face-to-face visits.