Answers to Your Questions

We understand you have questions.  Lean on us to answer questions like these that have been asked by others like you.

Is adoption a good choice for me and my child?

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It’s a wonderful choice. Your baby can be blessed with a wonderful, stable, loving family, and you can work toward your life goals, knowing that your child is being parented by a family you chose.

Do I receive any counseling while in the New Beginnings program?

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Yes. The social workers at New Beginnings counsel with all of our clients during their pregnancy. There is also post-partum counseling available.

Will I get pictures and updates of my baby?

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Yes. Every adoption has its own unique plan. Most families send pictures and updates periodically, while some have extensive on-going contact by phone or visits. Every birthmother and adoptive couple has their own level of comfort in this area, and we do our best to make everyone feel comfortable.

Can I be sure that my child is placed in a safe and secure home?

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As a licensed agency, we have guidelines that must be followed to make sure that all adoptive parents are secure financially, do not have a criminal record of any kind, that they have a stable marriage, that their home meets all safety standards and that they truly understand the concept of adoption, including a respect for birth parents. Also, a worker will visit their home after the child has been placed with them to make sure the placement is successful. You also will receive photos and updates about your child if you wish. Pictures are available of the couple’s home and family.

When can I sign the adoption papers?

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Mississippi: You will not be pressured into signing anything, because paperwork allowing a child to be placed for adoption cannot be signed until 72 hours after delivery. Tennessee: In Tennessee, the termination process is slightly different. Four days after the delivery, you and your legal representation (optional) will have to go before the judge to complete the termination process. After that court visit, you will have an additional three days to change your mind before the termination is final. If you change your mind after the initial court visit, you will have to go before the judge to revoke the surrender.

What about my medical bills and other expenses?

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While in the New Beginnings program there are no expenses to you—medical or living. Financial assistance is determined on a case-by-case basis.

If I do make an adoption plan, will the sad feelings ever go away?

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YES! An adoption choice is a life transition that can be difficult and emotional; it is not a lifelong grieving and recovery process. Lila, a nineteen year old birthmother said “I’ll always miss her and think of her, but I’ll never regret giving her the family that could give her the life that I never could. I believe that someday she will find me and tell me what a good thing I did for her.” Research has shown that birthmothers who make an adoption plan show the same level of satisfaction with their decision as those who choose to parent their child. The only two people that have any “legal” control over an adoption plan are the birthparents (the birthmother and the birthfather.)

How can I choose the family I want for my baby?

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We have many adoptive families available – some on this web site – and many others whose profiles are in our office. You choose a family based on what is important to you – whether it’s a religious preference, a preference about where they live, their educational level, whether or not you want them to have other children and just about any other preference you may be able to think of. You may meet them or talk to them by phone before your child is born. It is important for you to be completely comfortable with your choice!

Am I allowed to have contact with the family or my child after placement?

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The choice is yours. You may choose a confidential, semi-open or completely open adoption. You decide what level of contact you will want with your child and the adoptive parents. We will match you with a family that is comfortable with the level of contact that you desire.

Will my baby be able to go directly with the family I choose?

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Yes, some birthmoms want the adoptive family there for the birth of the child. If you don’t want that, the family will be there whenever you desire and your baby can go with the family as soon as the hospital discharge is complete. The family can even spend time with the baby in the hospital, to begin the bonding process, if you would like that to happen. Again, the choice is yours.

Will my child be able to have information about me?

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Absolutely, if that is what you desire. You may write a letter, send a gift or any other type of memento with the family for your child. All of our adoptive families are trained to “normalize” adoption from the very beginning. They will stress to your child that you made an adoption plan for your child BECAUSE of your unselfish and true love. Your child will know that you made this difficult decision because you cared more about the long-term welfare of your child than you did about your own emotions and feelings.

What about the father of the child? What rights does he have?

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He does have rights, but those vary based on the state where your child is born. However, if you do not have a comfortable relationship with him, we will be glad to handle that area of the adoption process for you.

If my child chooses to find me one day, how can that happen?

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If you choose a confidential adoption and have had no contact with your child, and your child chooses to search for you, someone from the agency will contact you and coordinate contact on whatever level you desire. You have the choice about contact and your desires will be respected. There is no “right or wrong” when it comes to contact – what matters is that you are comfortable with your choice.

Will I need to hire an attorney to complete my adoption plan?

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No, all legal services for the adoption process are handled by the agency.

Who should I trust to assist me with my adoption plan?

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A reputable, licensed adoption agency will provide the most secure adoption plan for you. That matters now and in the future. As an agency with many years of experience in adoption, we’ve heard some sad stories from birthmothers that chose to work with a “facilitator” or a private attorney. They were frustrated because they did not feel that their interests were a priority. They did not receive counseling and after placement, they felt as if there was no one they could call. If an attorney or facilitator is out of business, your adoption records may be lost forever. Licensed agencies are required to maintain adoption records in a fireproof setting forever! At New Beginnings, we will help you develop an adoption plan that is EXACTLY what you want. Your preferences matter to us and we will be here for you – now and in the future.

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