When you finally get brave enough to tell your friends and family you’re considering adopting, you’ll likely be met with a variety of questions and some well-meaning words of caution. Check out these Myths and Facts about the reality of adopting so you’ll be ready to help your family and friends love the idea of adoption as much as you do.
Myth 1: The adoption process takes many years.
Depending on how fast you get your paperwork and home study done in an international adoption is the ultimate guide to how quickly you will bring your forever child home. Also, if you decide on a domestic adoption, the timeframe can fluctuate, as it is unpredictable to whom the birthmother may choose as the prospective forever family.
Myth 2: The birthmother can take my baby back.
We hear this one a lot, but rest assured FOREVER family means FOREVER. Once the adoption papers are signed and finalized, that child is your child, forever. However, some states, have a revocation period during which the birthmother can revoke her consent prior to the adoption being finalized. Adoptive families have the opportunity to to assess the risks on a case-by-case basis before signing off on an agreement. In a handful of rare cases that have made the news, birthmothers were not truthful about the birthfather’s identity. Licensed agencies work with care to avoid those situations and keep adoptive families aware of risk situations.
Myth 3: Most birthmothers are teens.
Statistics show that most birthmothers who choose adoption for their child are between the ages of 19 and 30. They choose adoption because they know a forever family can give their child a better life. A lot of the time, it’s already single mothers who know and understand the realities involved in raising a child.
Myth 4: Adopted children are unstable and have behavior issues.
Actually, studies show that adopted children are just as adjusted as children raised with their biological parents. Other studies have shown that the adopted child is better adjusted because adoptive families tend to be more financially stable and mature.
Myth 5: Adoptions are too expensive.
Domestic adoptions can range anywhere less than $10,000 to $40,000 depending on whether you use an agency or simply work with an adoption attorney. (Although working outside of an agency carries it’s own financial and emotional risks.) Adopting an older child can be dramatically less expensive and some state foster programs involve little, or if any money. A newly passed tax credit allows families to apply for up to $12,000 that can help with the financials in adoption.
Many factors go into prospective family’s decision regarding adoption. Today, many resources and support systems are available for these families to make the adoption process as easy as possible. With the support available, these families are able to prepare for the joys of adopting a forever child.